Good News Bad News

I too had a fabulous day at the Choice Mom's Conference.  But now I am all UPSET and in a big  Tizwoz!

Today I went to get my day 3 tests done and start a cycle of injectables.  I was really excited to find that for the first time ever, instead of having 5-6 follicles like I did at my first ultrasound,  or 7-8 like at the last.  (The first natural cycles I did were not monitored). This time I had a grand total of 13 - a baker's dozen!  It must be either the Co Q 10 I have been taking or the 6 days yoga vacation in the sun.

I did become rather concerned when after lunch, the nurse had not called me with my blood results and given me the OK to start taking the letrozol.  I was just beginning to worry (that I had been forgotten about - or deliberately overlooked as a result of my trying to leave their clinic) when she finally called, and said to go right ahead.  When I asked about the blood tests - she did not answer - but tried to distract me with details of the medication.  On asking a second time, she told me my FSH is 20.3.  Last month it was 14.3 and a few months before  that 8.1  My initial search on the internet tells me that some centers will not do IVF with patients over 20 - its a "no go area".  I remember Dr Surrey said he didn't want mine getting much higher than 14.

Of course no-one has thought to run an AMH level - which I had realized I should request (thanks to the Choice Moms yesterday) - and got drawn this morning (gives best predictor of number of eggs still up for production). It takes 10 days to get the answer.  The Weekend Doctor seemed very surprised it had not already been done.

Most worrying, was the fact that the nurse said I was to come back for monitoring on day 11 (which is really day 12 because they wouldn't count that my period arrived in the afternoon of the day before day one).  I ovulate on day 11, and last time I took femara I ovulated day 10.  I asked the nurse if I could come in earlier and she said "you don't need to because we are monitoring you".  I said "oh good, when will you do that?" to which she answered "when you come in on day 11".   Then I think I may have said something about using an OPK and letting her know if it turned sooner and she said "oh no - I wouldn't really recommend doing that - because your being monitored!"  I think I must be going crazy!

Does anyone know - does having high FSH mean that the drugs don't work? - Thats what I thought I understood from my reading.  Will 5 mg of letrozol and 75  X  3 units of Gonadotropins do anything for me?

Given that I am so unhappy with my the communication with my doctor.  I think the anxiety alone might finish me off - I have to decide - do I bag this cycle and run to colorado / and miss loads of work short notice. Do I try a natural cycle - where I will get a properly timed insemination - (and then run) - and not subject myself to drugs which probably won't do anything (except that the femara / letrozol will give me more headaches).  Do I take the drugs and pray - write letter to the doctor pleading to bring me in earlier say day 9.  (I have a friend who recently missed a whole cycle because she ovulated day 8 and they completely missed it!)

Now I have to find something to do which will help me Lose my Tizwoz.  Perhaps I could hide it somewhere - for someone else to find? -  I wish I could - Not very nice of me.