Saturday, May 21, 2011

Best chicken soup ever - oh so easy!

I want to thank everyone for their comments.  It means so much to me to know that there really are wonderful people out there and that you understood me.

I wanted to write a really positive post (for a change).  I am not really a cook, but I am so proud of this super easy recipe, discovered / explained to me by my mom.  There are just two Magic ingredients, and once you know them, you can make a chicken soup which would make any Jewish mama proud!

Firstly, it helps if everything is organic and if you have at least two hours and HUGE pot.  But I have made it very satisfactorily with none of the above.  Prep time is about 7-10 minutes (depending on how sharp your scissors are for skinning the chicken).  Veggies can be cut in very large lumps.

Then you need the usual ingredients like chicken drumsticks (cut off the skin), onions, garlic, carrots, mushrooms (I like shiitake) and any other choice of veggie you wish, in your pot with plenty of water and set to simmer.

To this mix you also add the TWO Magic ingredients.  A few chunks of the rind of a cheese like peccorino or parmesan, (if you don't have the rind you can also use  a few lumps of the cheese) and a WHOLE lemon.  With a grater, drop the zest of your lemon in the pot with all the other ingredients, then slice the lemon/s, (being sure to cut off and disgard any pith), and then drop the slices too into the pot, just as you would with any other vegetable.

No need for a stock cube, but you can add some if you wish. Add more salt than pepper (and possibly braggs liquid aminos - it's like soya sauce).  Boil for two hours! (but this should taste good after just an hour).  Add extra salt and extra lemon juice if necessary.

Then if you wish, you can thicken the broth with either cous cous or some other grain / rice.  Enjoy!

As for quantities, you will always wish you had more broth and more veggies!  If anyone has any additional suggestions - please do share!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Outrageous Hormones - horrible feelings

I apologize because I have not been posting or keeping up with reading everyone's blogs.  Sadly I just seem to have lost a lot of the joy I used to find in reading them.  Its just that when you feel like throwing up, nothing really seams to matter.  Every once in a while I have a better day or few hours, but life has been a Real Huge Struggle.  Thank God I have a super easy job, which has enabled numerous afternoon sleepovers with my dog close by my side.  But in actual fact I realize I hate going to work.

When life gets tough, sadly its never just one thing that goes wrong - its FIVE things, all wrong together - and it makes me wonder if I don't deserve it - or bring it on myself in some way.   And of course upsettingly there seems to be a theme - issues with friends, colleagues and jealousy.

Firstly, I realize must be depressed - even though I keep telling myself how happy I am to be pregnant - that I didn't have to do IVF, but in reality I would do anything just to feel well and have some really good friends.

Secondly, a colleague who has been really rather nasty to me for the past three years, is pregnant, not that she told Me - but Why does she have to be pregnant at the same time as me? It will be the two of us pregnant at work together.  She is 18 weeks and hardly showing, she has had all the tests and knows she is having a healthy baby.  I overheard her saying in tones of disgust "We didn't need ANY help getting pregnant." I can't control my feelings.  I am jealous as hell.  She has tons of friends, a wonderful husband, recently (and very publicly) inherited millions of dollars, and she frequently gives parties to which our whole company is invited (except me and one other perfectly nice colleague who actually lives across the road from her house).  When she needs my help, she will have someone else ask me for the favor, and then treat me like shit.

In addition I was at work earlier this week, and was required to give (some very mild) feedback to a colleague.  His retort was to go to management and accuse me, of hitting and kicking him.  Management did clearly not take the accusation seriously - but nor did they seem to have any problem with him making up stories.  Another colleague, who was completely uninvolved in any part of this, took up this guy's case, so much so, that she publicly yelled at me and said "if you ever hit or kick anyone again - the whole team has been given the authority to hit and kick you back together".  I was so shocked and stunned, (and obviously did not believe for a moment that any legitimate workplace advice could be to attack someone.)  The timing was such that without saying the field in which I work - it was absolutely impossible to respond.  So I sat down, completely shocked that anyone could believe I would ever attack someone (let alone a very tall athletic man),  and we all resumed our work.  Of course now I have decided to document with a paper trail, but why do I have to work with people who belong in kindergarten?  I want to quit.  After I get my maternity leave.

Lastly, I have really enjoyed getting to know other Single Mothers by Choice in my small town.  In early december I got to know a new SMC.  We met a few times, and spoke regularly on the phone and were in fairly close contact.  Latterly she had failed to respond to a couple of group invitations and a phone call, so she did not hear that I am now pregnant.  Yesterday she called to tell me in a rather distracted manner that she too is pregnant.  I was delighted for her, until I realized that she has been pregnant since the beginning of the YEAR.  She is 19 weeks, knows she is having a healthy boy, the donor of her boy is her EX husband - so she has a man to pay child support, and a father for her son.  I just feel so deceived. All those times she called to know if I got my BFP, all the mean while she was lying to me.  What is the point in being friendly to someone who does not trust me enough to share their good news, who consistently lies to me "Oh no,  I got my period,  I must make that appointment at CCRM" and then doesn't think there its anything unusual.  I expect she only told me so I can be invited to give a gift for her baby shower.

And Really Lastly.  My niece is pregnant with a Billionaire.  I have been assured by her father that the pregnancy was planned - but seemingly to me it was badly planned because she is five months, and he is still married to someone else.  Either way it seems to me she will do quite well out of it.  Everyone is being So supportive of her - people are flying in from Paris and around the world to help with the baby etc.  And to top it off - I have been informed that her son's name - Is the very one I had picked out should I have a son.  Well now there will be TWO !

Fortunately I get to visit my mother next week, which Could be great, or not, but anyway the scene change, and escape from work will be very welcome.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

7 weeks 4 days utrasound

I was so nervous about this first ultrasound I could not fall asleep for my obligatory 3 hour afternoon nap.  The doc was late but finally arrived and she got her magic wand in place.

Truth be told I have been feeling so awful recently, that I have sworn to myself that I will never ever try to get pregnant again.  There is just something about feeling constantly sick and exhausted that makes any life seem unnecessary and pointless.  I think I may also have been a little depressed.  I have spent most of my hours lying asleep in bed or comatose in front of the TV or trying to think of ways to avoid doing anything.

My only other activity has been that of praying for TWINS - call me naive - I know they are a huge amount of work.  And I have just figured out that if there was a fire in my house - it would be very difficult to run out of the house Fast with Two babies.

Anyway - It seems God has better sense than I did.  It appears that I have One Healthy Baby - I am greatly relieved - and it may even arrive in time for Christmas.  My mom says I should be extremely thankful I got such a cheap blessing - total costs so far (excluding unused sperm in storage) - is only $3700.  I am SO happy I didn't have to pay for IVF.  But it is such a pity I didnt have three - one for keeps - one to give away - and one to sell on ebay!

I am of course so overjoyed to know my dream of being a mother is coming true - Dr Uncommunicative wants to see me again in two weeks, which will be just a week before my nuchal scan - I can only imagine it's about the money.  She did manage to tell me though that the heart rate was normal at 161 - and give me two ultrasound photos.  However for anyone not experienced in these sort of things - it really does look like a receipt from the supermarket gone wrong - so much so that BABY has to be labelled - you would not know it  otherwise.  None the less I am growing very fond of the photos - and no doubt in a few days I with own nothing with more sentimental value!

In the mean while, it all seems so unbelievable.  Actually the last few days have been feeling substantially better and I have found that ice cream  definitely reduces the nausea - and remarkably I still have one pair of jeans that fit me just fine - but not for long I think!