Truth be said - she is actually my dog's Best Friend's Mother, but we frequently walk the dogs around the neighborhood, such that I feel she is or aught to be one of My best friends. In fact, she has been more a part of my TTC discussions than anyone except my mother.
As we have both been out of town for some weeks, Friday was the first time I actually got to tell her that I am Pregnant. Thinking back, she has been very kind to me - an excellent chef, she has taught me to make a number of "Mummy dishes" so that I can be able to cook something my child one day might wish to eat, and she has often baby sat my dog.
I suppose there were a couple of signs that she was not particularly happy for me to try to get pregnant. I remember the day she told me just after my first IUI "Who knows - you might find they mixed up the sperm, you could be giving birth to a Black baby" to which I said, "That would be just fine - at least I would know that whatever sperm the bank sent, it comes from a super healthy, smart college grad - and the baby will be genetically mine. But the couple down the road (who did IVF) They could potentially find out that neither of their (gorgeous) twins are theirs at all. They might belong to another couple entirely!" And thankfully that was the end of that. I have to admit, I was SO relieved that I never told her about my donor freak out! (About his high forehead and need of a makeover!)
Then there was the time when she said to me, "I don't even know if you will be a good mother - You told me you might not bother buying a crib ((no because I might be lent one - and I do have some odd ideas about child rearing - but obviously will make sure my child is safe)) And you said that if you don't like the way your kids looks when it arrives, you will donate it to GoodWill" - This is actually is true, but I thought anyone would know I was kidding!
After I had heard her latest holiday news, I shared my BIG News. I heard her saying "I hope you don't think you can replace the love of a Husband with that of a Baby!" Trying to keep things light hearted, I commented that I wouldn't have to, because I had already replaced it with the love of my DOG. She did not seem satisfied and said "Well I hope you have a lot of money saved for therapy - because you're going to need it!" She continued her ruminations, such that I felt bound to say "Well actually there's no way to know What love replaces What - because you don't have a baby in your tommy - and I don't have a husband - so there is no way to compare."
Then she started to say "And what are you going to tell people - about the father - you've GOT to be honest." The weird thing is that I could understand someone asking me all these questions if this was the first time they had heard of me wanting a baby - but she has been part of the process since well before the beginning! So I said "Well I can say whatever I want - actually it is fairly rude for people to ask - so I might just say I have no idea who he is, whatsoever!" She then said "You will Have to tell them the Truth - you will have to say - """I couldn't get a steady relationship and I was getting SO old I decided to get myself inseminated""" you HAVE to be honest". At this point I must admit I was getting really annoyed and I couldn't understand why she would ever think that I would lie - as I am not someone who ever lies.
I guess I was running out of answers, so I said "well I could always ask them for details about their father (as it really is none of their business) - or I could tell them I ordered a vial over the internet" She said "Well their father will actually Have a name, and your child's father doesn't" Then she actually continued - "Look at how you turned out, with what your mother told you about Your Father" At this point I was really annoyed but tried to keep calm, so said "Well actually my mother has never lied to me - and if you don't mind me saying so, I think I've turned out - just fine"
Now a normal person would probably have left the conversation at this point - but like an idiot I stayed - and brought up less inflammatory topics. We managed to keep walking a further quarter mile or so, until we came to a small hill. At this point I started to feel a little odd / faint / and feel some sort of pressure in places I won't mention, and so sat down for a few minutes under a tree.
Instead of her saying "Are you OK" she said "Well if you're going to start acting Like That, People are going to start asking" and like an idiot I said "Not if you help me think up some really good excuses." A moment later still immersed in a very unpleasant conversation, we bumped into some neighbors, and finally I had the good sense to wave good bye, and go on home by my self. Only when I had arrived home, did it dawn on me that she had never once said Congratulations.
The only explanation I can think of - Is that despite what she has always said (in the four years I have know her) - SHE Wants a Baby! I am never walking my dog with her again - at least not until she finds a better mood. The problem is, we keep bumping in to each other - and our dogs just Love each other!
PS I want to thank everyone for their Lovely Lovely, encouraging and wonderful comments - And Many thanks for my Versatile Blogger Award! -BTW my Second beta test got great numbers and I am currently preparing another post about various gossip that was not relevant to this post!