Apparently miracles do happen! She talked, she listened, she explained, she debated. After all the efforts I had made to switch to the other clinic in town, I have decided to stay put.
I even learned something new, because I requested that they split my donor vials of sperm so I could do double the amount of "try's" before I run out of Sage's donor.
Every time I have gone in for my insemination they have given me a sperm count - 27 million, 75 million, etc. But what they were actually quoting me, was sperm per unit (centiliter ?) - and in a vial there is only half a unit. The time they told me 20 million was actually only 19 and a half - so I was delivered less than 10 million sperm and would have qualified for a rebate from the sperm bank - because they are supposed to deliver a minimum of 10 million!
So i had to explain the importance of communication. I then went forth and told her how in this regard I should actually explain that when I got pregnant with Sage - I didn't exactly take the drugs quite how they were prescribed - and gave my reasonings. She took it great, and with interest.
I explained how I took only 2.5 mg or femara rather than 5, earlier injections of gonal F (didn't say I had consulted with 3 other RE's), and my reasonings for wishing to take less ovarial next time (I felt it nearly caused my ovaries to hemorrhage.) I then explained how I believed that the progesterone supplementation had not been good for me - she agreed to test me when / if I get pregnant, and supplement me with some other form of progesterone should I need it.
The whole visit was extraordinary. I don't know What has happened in her life to make her so different, but I liked it and decided to go with the flow. We also ended on a very upscale note when she explained to me how important it was that I do stop doing natural cycles because of the percentage of people she see's with no obvious reason for infertility, and the first time they do a medicated cycle they get pregnant. She explained how the boosting of the hormones increases the blood flow, and just makes it happen!
I felt very lucky because so many of my SMC friends get the "oh you are old your eggs aren't going to work" speech. I know I am 42 - and that I will go to donor egg if my two medicated cycles don't work (still debating an IVF). But I might as well be positive till I see how it works out.
The the icing on the cake - was that my clinic is very soon going to be partnering with one of the largest donor egg banks in the world - so I won't even have to leave town for a donor egg cycle!
The only thing holding me back at the moment is that I am packing boxes and having a very stressful time moving house. I could write a whole blog on this alone - but i won't bore you guys with it here. The only thing it means, is that I am actually quite pleased to be sitting out another cycle, so i can not be quite as stressed.
Had a 36 hours of hell, and then suddenly the world shifted and everything seems like it will be OK.