Having tried 3 natural IUIs with No success my mother was insisting that there "must" be something wrong - not with my eggs (age 42.5) or with my hugely elevated FSH (around 17) or my lack of AMH (0.16) but with my uterus. We did do a few ultrasounds mid cycle which showed nothing - and apparently polyps do not return too frequently!
Before I got pregnant with Sage I had 3 failed IUIs and then we found the uterine polyp - and Sage implanted on the next try. So my mother insisted I must have another polyp. At my last check in with Doc uncommunicative I requested a sonohystogram - Uterus filled with water on ultrasound.
Today we found a polyp just as my mother suggested. Makes me feel so much more hopeful. The Doc said she would try and fit me in her operating schedule on Wednesday, failing that after my next period.
She also said I could try the surgery without general anesthetic - I assured her that last time I lost my memory for weeks and didn't want to go through that again. I asked her how much worse it could be than natural child birth? She thought not - and will only last about 20 minutes. I do plan to take 3 ibuprofen - and we might try to have an anesthetist on hand that is used to routinely doing epidural!
Other news, we moved house at the weekend- to a better school district (and I have to get my moneys worth and make sure I get my second child). The new house is the thing of which many people could only dream. I woke up and saw three Bambi in the garden.
Two neighbors came over with gifts fitting a movie script. One of these included 10 different gifts all of which I adored, cheese plate, crackers (gluten free) cheese board of the most gorgeous wood, cheese knives, honey, honey dish, honey dispenser, gorgeous woven basket, divine grapes, raspberries, and a gift for my daughter.
Back to unpacking boxes, and trying to get the printer to work!
Monday, August 26, 2013
Friday, August 16, 2013
Dr Uncommunicative changes her tune!
Apparently miracles do happen! She talked, she listened, she explained, she debated. After all the efforts I had made to switch to the other clinic in town, I have decided to stay put.
I even learned something new, because I requested that they split my donor vials of sperm so I could do double the amount of "try's" before I run out of Sage's donor.
Every time I have gone in for my insemination they have given me a sperm count - 27 million, 75 million, etc. But what they were actually quoting me, was sperm per unit (centiliter ?) - and in a vial there is only half a unit. The time they told me 20 million was actually only 19 and a half - so I was delivered less than 10 million sperm and would have qualified for a rebate from the sperm bank - because they are supposed to deliver a minimum of 10 million!
So i had to explain the importance of communication. I then went forth and told her how in this regard I should actually explain that when I got pregnant with Sage - I didn't exactly take the drugs quite how they were prescribed - and gave my reasonings. She took it great, and with interest.
I explained how I took only 2.5 mg or femara rather than 5, earlier injections of gonal F (didn't say I had consulted with 3 other RE's), and my reasonings for wishing to take less ovarial next time (I felt it nearly caused my ovaries to hemorrhage.) I then explained how I believed that the progesterone supplementation had not been good for me - she agreed to test me when / if I get pregnant, and supplement me with some other form of progesterone should I need it.
The whole visit was extraordinary. I don't know What has happened in her life to make her so different, but I liked it and decided to go with the flow. We also ended on a very upscale note when she explained to me how important it was that I do stop doing natural cycles because of the percentage of people she see's with no obvious reason for infertility, and the first time they do a medicated cycle they get pregnant. She explained how the boosting of the hormones increases the blood flow, and just makes it happen!
I felt very lucky because so many of my SMC friends get the "oh you are old your eggs aren't going to work" speech. I know I am 42 - and that I will go to donor egg if my two medicated cycles don't work (still debating an IVF). But I might as well be positive till I see how it works out.
The the icing on the cake - was that my clinic is very soon going to be partnering with one of the largest donor egg banks in the world - so I won't even have to leave town for a donor egg cycle!
The only thing holding me back at the moment is that I am packing boxes and having a very stressful time moving house. I could write a whole blog on this alone - but i won't bore you guys with it here. The only thing it means, is that I am actually quite pleased to be sitting out another cycle, so i can not be quite as stressed.
Had a 36 hours of hell, and then suddenly the world shifted and everything seems like it will be OK.
I even learned something new, because I requested that they split my donor vials of sperm so I could do double the amount of "try's" before I run out of Sage's donor.
Every time I have gone in for my insemination they have given me a sperm count - 27 million, 75 million, etc. But what they were actually quoting me, was sperm per unit (centiliter ?) - and in a vial there is only half a unit. The time they told me 20 million was actually only 19 and a half - so I was delivered less than 10 million sperm and would have qualified for a rebate from the sperm bank - because they are supposed to deliver a minimum of 10 million!
So i had to explain the importance of communication. I then went forth and told her how in this regard I should actually explain that when I got pregnant with Sage - I didn't exactly take the drugs quite how they were prescribed - and gave my reasonings. She took it great, and with interest.
I explained how I took only 2.5 mg or femara rather than 5, earlier injections of gonal F (didn't say I had consulted with 3 other RE's), and my reasonings for wishing to take less ovarial next time (I felt it nearly caused my ovaries to hemorrhage.) I then explained how I believed that the progesterone supplementation had not been good for me - she agreed to test me when / if I get pregnant, and supplement me with some other form of progesterone should I need it.
The whole visit was extraordinary. I don't know What has happened in her life to make her so different, but I liked it and decided to go with the flow. We also ended on a very upscale note when she explained to me how important it was that I do stop doing natural cycles because of the percentage of people she see's with no obvious reason for infertility, and the first time they do a medicated cycle they get pregnant. She explained how the boosting of the hormones increases the blood flow, and just makes it happen!
I felt very lucky because so many of my SMC friends get the "oh you are old your eggs aren't going to work" speech. I know I am 42 - and that I will go to donor egg if my two medicated cycles don't work (still debating an IVF). But I might as well be positive till I see how it works out.
The the icing on the cake - was that my clinic is very soon going to be partnering with one of the largest donor egg banks in the world - so I won't even have to leave town for a donor egg cycle!
The only thing holding me back at the moment is that I am packing boxes and having a very stressful time moving house. I could write a whole blog on this alone - but i won't bore you guys with it here. The only thing it means, is that I am actually quite pleased to be sitting out another cycle, so i can not be quite as stressed.
Had a 36 hours of hell, and then suddenly the world shifted and everything seems like it will be OK.
Monday, July 22, 2013
13 days post IUI - regroup
My mother refuses to believe that I am not pregnant! I suppose it should make me happy, she still has hope where there is none. (But it just makes me a little concerned about her - she is 82 and not quite herself lately).
I took a pregnancy test with my breast milk - just for fun - and to see another false positive.
I feel strangely accepting of this cycle not working out, and have decided not to doubt physical symptoms I felt, but I am pleased to say, I now have a very pain free period - after all the pains I felt for the last days. Weird.
Yesterday I had a play date with a very "granola" friend. She was so funny because she just said point blank. "Completely wean and take drugs!" Turns out that's what she had to do after 3 years of marriage - with no discovered infertility problem with either her or her husband, and their first medicated IUI worked. She has told no one. Why are people so secretive about getting fertility help?
I also suddenly realized that I have absolutely no confidence in my doctor (I can't really make sensible decisions about protocol) and so i have decided to switch clinics. It Turns out the first available new patient appointment at the other clinic is at the end of september. I will call in every day for a cancellation. I'm not waiting that long - it would put me doing an IUI in early november!
Finally if I have to do another cycle while I wait to switch clinics - I am worried about running out of vials (I have a good number - but there are absolutely no more when these are done.) I was reading something on the internet about splitting a vial. My donor consistently has more than 20 000 swimmers - why could I not use half - It's just I don't trust my doctor to get the right day - and when I got pregnant with Sage ended up using two vials to cover our bases. I don't have enough to do this again.
I spoke to someone at my bank who said they had never even heard of this (and seemed rather annoyed at me). Such a pity because every other time I have called, they have really excelled themselves. One time they even had me talk to the head of their sperm research. Too bad I forgot his name!
I took a pregnancy test with my breast milk - just for fun - and to see another false positive.
I feel strangely accepting of this cycle not working out, and have decided not to doubt physical symptoms I felt, but I am pleased to say, I now have a very pain free period - after all the pains I felt for the last days. Weird.
Yesterday I had a play date with a very "granola" friend. She was so funny because she just said point blank. "Completely wean and take drugs!" Turns out that's what she had to do after 3 years of marriage - with no discovered infertility problem with either her or her husband, and their first medicated IUI worked. She has told no one. Why are people so secretive about getting fertility help?
I also suddenly realized that I have absolutely no confidence in my doctor (I can't really make sensible decisions about protocol) and so i have decided to switch clinics. It Turns out the first available new patient appointment at the other clinic is at the end of september. I will call in every day for a cancellation. I'm not waiting that long - it would put me doing an IUI in early november!
Finally if I have to do another cycle while I wait to switch clinics - I am worried about running out of vials (I have a good number - but there are absolutely no more when these are done.) I was reading something on the internet about splitting a vial. My donor consistently has more than 20 000 swimmers - why could I not use half - It's just I don't trust my doctor to get the right day - and when I got pregnant with Sage ended up using two vials to cover our bases. I don't have enough to do this again.
I spoke to someone at my bank who said they had never even heard of this (and seemed rather annoyed at me). Such a pity because every other time I have called, they have really excelled themselves. One time they even had me talk to the head of their sperm research. Too bad I forgot his name!
Saturday, July 20, 2013
11 days post IUI Oh My.....
For some reason after I had explained to my mother how ridiculous it would be to test, I noticed Sage was engrossed in a baby signing time video, and I decided it might be an idea to take one anyway.
I managed to find my last first response test - stuck in with a packet of ovulation predictor tests.
I peed. I watched the color move across the strip, and there before my eyes two faint pink lines appeared. I was ecstatic. I cried, out of relief and happiness, texted a few friends, was about to call my mother to tell her the good news, when instinct told me not to.
Last time this happened I got my period. I was just thinking about posting on this blog - when it occurred to me there was something slightly different about the test. I couldn't put my finger on it. Perhaps they had changed something. Turns out it wasn't a pregnancy test at all - only some give away fertility test measuring FSH.
What an idiot I am - but why would they make the tests nearly identical? It should say NOT at pregnancy test all over it! I can't be the first person to make this mistake.
I took a real test after that - and results don't look good!
I managed to find my last first response test - stuck in with a packet of ovulation predictor tests.
I peed. I watched the color move across the strip, and there before my eyes two faint pink lines appeared. I was ecstatic. I cried, out of relief and happiness, texted a few friends, was about to call my mother to tell her the good news, when instinct told me not to.
Last time this happened I got my period. I was just thinking about posting on this blog - when it occurred to me there was something slightly different about the test. I couldn't put my finger on it. Perhaps they had changed something. Turns out it wasn't a pregnancy test at all - only some give away fertility test measuring FSH.
What an idiot I am - but why would they make the tests nearly identical? It should say NOT at pregnancy test all over it! I can't be the first person to make this mistake.
I took a real test after that - and results don't look good!
Friday, July 19, 2013
10 days post IUI
Feeling a little hopeful. No period in sight, still pains though. No queazy feeling in the last 36 hours. Sore tits.
My mother just called from UK to say could I "please test immediately" because she simply has to know "right now" so she can make her plans! What the XXXX
I am not testing yet because it wouldn't tell me anything conclusive. On 9 days post IUI on a previous cycle, I had the very faintest positive only to be followed the next day by a very painful period.
Now is the time I start to barter with god - If you.... I will....
My mother just called from UK to say could I "please test immediately" because she simply has to know "right now" so she can make her plans! What the XXXX
I am not testing yet because it wouldn't tell me anything conclusive. On 9 days post IUI on a previous cycle, I had the very faintest positive only to be followed the next day by a very painful period.
Now is the time I start to barter with god - If you.... I will....
Thursday, July 18, 2013
9 days post iui
In honesty I have no idea any more.
Today I had to attend a meeting outside in the heat, first thing in the morning and I never recovered from the exhaustion and headache. Also I woke in the night and feeling distinctly queasy, so I got up and made oats. Last time I did an IUI I felt sick right before I got my period, so feeling sick was probably not a good sign. Needless to say I have felt period pains all day, and spent the majority of my day seemingly checking my underwear to see if my period has started.
Life is a little cruel this way because on a normal cycle no IUI, I have next to no period pains at all, certainly not for days on end. It makes me think something must have happened, but how long for how long I don't know.
Can't believe I didn't waste a pregnancy test today, but I know its way too early - and my period will probably start the moment I try to test! I have though arranged a busy / social weekend, so I can have some friends around if / when I get my bad news.
On a positive note my tits have become really quite sore when Sage milks me!
Today I had to attend a meeting outside in the heat, first thing in the morning and I never recovered from the exhaustion and headache. Also I woke in the night and feeling distinctly queasy, so I got up and made oats. Last time I did an IUI I felt sick right before I got my period, so feeling sick was probably not a good sign. Needless to say I have felt period pains all day, and spent the majority of my day seemingly checking my underwear to see if my period has started.
Life is a little cruel this way because on a normal cycle no IUI, I have next to no period pains at all, certainly not for days on end. It makes me think something must have happened, but how long for how long I don't know.
Can't believe I didn't waste a pregnancy test today, but I know its way too early - and my period will probably start the moment I try to test! I have though arranged a busy / social weekend, so I can have some friends around if / when I get my bad news.
On a positive note my tits have become really quite sore when Sage milks me!
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
7 & 8 days post IUI
No implantation bleeding! Oh dear. I did have a few moments of depression about this until I got suddenly really busy, which has kept me well distracted.
For some reason my mother consulted our UK acupuncturist who said that under no circumstances should I fly long distance until I am 8 weeks pregnant. Not sure why this is and I couldn't find statistical data. Anyone know why this would be?
So my wonderful mother has decided that if I am pregnant I should not come and visit - and has informed the entire extended family that I am trying to get pregnant and am probably already so - So they should not expect me to visit this summer. JUST GREAT!
Meanwhile my tits do not hurt or show any signs of doing so. Sage is enjoying my milk more than ever (she had sort of gone off it for a while), and I just feel like I am very plugged up waiting for a rather painful period!
Oh well. Time will tell!
For some reason my mother consulted our UK acupuncturist who said that under no circumstances should I fly long distance until I am 8 weeks pregnant. Not sure why this is and I couldn't find statistical data. Anyone know why this would be?
So my wonderful mother has decided that if I am pregnant I should not come and visit - and has informed the entire extended family that I am trying to get pregnant and am probably already so - So they should not expect me to visit this summer. JUST GREAT!
Meanwhile my tits do not hurt or show any signs of doing so. Sage is enjoying my milk more than ever (she had sort of gone off it for a while), and I just feel like I am very plugged up waiting for a rather painful period!
Oh well. Time will tell!
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